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Then moving into understanding your needs and how they relate to your partner, starts you well on your way to building a secure relationship.
When the going gets tough and your attachment system is activated are you one to cling or hightail it out of there?
This is the guy that busies up his schedule so as to limit your time together, or the girl that dates loads of guys telling them all the same thing; ‘nothing serious please’. Embodying the worst of both worlds, they typically have a multitude of other emotional problems in other areas of their life (for e.g. There is much inner conflict: they desire but simultaneously resist intimacy, push people away, are suspicious of others’ intentions and fear annihilation in intimacy scenarios.11.
who is well-versed in attachment theory as it relates to relationships.
We may then choose someone who is more possessive or overly demanding of attention.Neither one is right nor wrong, each style has different needs.This post is focusing on the avoidant/dismissive attachment style (the hightailers), which is characterized by a strong need for independence and self-sufficiency.Our style of attachment affects everything from our partner selection to how well our relationships progress and to, sadly, how they end.
That is why recognizing our attachment pattern can help us understand our strengths and vulnerabilities in a relationship.
Do you ever wonder how you can go from a completely sane and confident person, to a clinging or withdrawing relationshipzilla in about 60 seconds flat?